Books That Haunt Me in 2023
Some stories have a reason to haunt you!
Dear Reader,
OMG, I just can’t believe we are already in the last month of the year! But first, let me confess - I’ve been on a reading spree since September and I’m wrapping up the year with some disturbing books that haunt me long after I’ve finished reading them.
Radhika Iyengar’s “Fire on the Ganges” is what I’d call a “haunting” book. The characters lived on inside my head weeks after I had finished reading.
While a part of me wants to share more about Iyengar’s book, another part of me seeks more time to pause the thoughts in my head and the emotions in heart. Maybe I will just talk about this book separately.
I’d highly recommend “Fire on the Ganges” to curious readers.
But it’s not for the faint-hearted or casual reader.
This book shakes you up, literally!
The next book that disturbed me beyond words is Atharva Pandit’s Hurda.
Hurda is a deeply disturbing portrait of a casteist, patriarchal village where three sisters - Anisha, Sanchita and Priyanka - disappear one afternoon.
Their disappearance places them at the centre of the village’s obsession with the ‘green top’ the missing girl was last seen wearing. The biases that dominate the village’s cultural model offers a disturbing glimpse into the stark reality of rural life.
For all the rigour with which their mother - branded as a witch by the rest of the village - protected her daughters, the outside world violated all norms of humanity and unleashes a horrifying tale of violence. This was a raw, painful book to read. If you are a parent with little girls at home, don’t read it. This will just haunt you!
While none of the villagers know where the three sisters went or why, everyone remembers the ‘sexy green top’ the eldest girl wore.
Finally, it takes a journalist from Mumbai to revisit the mystery of the missing girls six years later.
Highly disturbing, this book treads forbidden paths through raw voices.
Another book that caught my interest has been 'Madam Sir' by Manjari Jaruhar. A sentence leapt out from the book. And you bet I dived into this book instantly!
‘You are not fit to tie my son’s shoelaces’
This is the story of Bihar’s first woman IPS officer.
The book is symbolic of the story of the struggles of many ordinary women in India. We fight biases inside the institution called ‘the family’ and with the world outside it.
At workplaces, among family groups and friends, many married women openly share stories of domestic violence and abuse and how they are treated by their in-laws. At work places, women hide their tears behind confident smiles. The number of women I have seen crying inside washrooms and at their desks —— it’s not remotely funny. It’s the stark reality of almost every working woman’s life in this country.
From being labelled ‘not fair enough’ to ‘not slim enough’ to ‘not stylish enough’ and often ‘not rich enough’ or ‘not wearing enough gold jewellery’, the Indian bride is never “enough”!
But the bridegroom is always too perfect to be found fault with!
When I first came to Delhi (this is still an unforgettable incident!), I met a lovely young bride who was newly married. When I visited her residence, she took me to her room, which resembled a grand suite, and I was awe struck by the sheer luxury. She showed me her wardrobe that was stuffed with food items and chocolates.
Boxes of chocolates tumbled out and I wondered why there was so much food in her wardrobe.
And then she told me something that I still can’t get out of my head.
Her in-laws wanted her to be thin. So, food was measured in teaspoons and served to her once a day and she smuggled food through her cousins and hid it in her wardrobe!
Having grown up in a family where women did not have to take refuge in the weighing scales daily, this information shocked me!
The women I grew up with - my grandmother, aunts, mother - they were all far more empowered because they could live life the way they wanted to. They were women of simplicity, discipline and grit!
Frankly, each to her own, but it’s a tragedy when women choose to waste their time, life and talent to make life a misery for others and themselves. What is saddening is when women behave insensitively to each other, instead of being more empathetic.
Increasingly, this is the reality.
It’s all about looks too.
The bride is the sacrificial goat. For what, I still haven’t figured it out.
In the book ‘MADAM SIR’, the hard reality of matrimonial arbitrariness hits hard for a young girl from an affluent and privileged family in Bihar.
Her family members are in positions of power such as MPs and IAS officers. When she goes through emotional and mental abuse, everyone is helpless.
It doesn’t matter that her family members have political or social influence. The reality hits hard.
Seeing how tough the situation becomes, she actually goes back to her husband’s family, almost begging for another chance to prove herself worthy.
Once again, every one’s happy. The woman has surrendered her self-respect.
Life can go on smoothly again. For the husband and his family, obviously.
What is remarkable about Manjari’s story is that she takes charge of her life finally. Her divorce teaches her to rely on herself and to grow her own strengths.
She figures out smartly there is no ‘Happily Forever After’ world.
And that’s just the beginning of her story as Bihar’s first woman IPS officer.
‘Madam Sir’ chronicles the life of a woman IPS officer. Well-written, gripping and candid, it is a book that will give you courage and inspiration.
Another book I enjoyed reading is Shobha Tharoor Srinivasan's 'Good Innings: The Extraordinary, Ordinary Life of Lily Tharoor' and reading this book has been a real pleasure. Just for clarity - No, it didn’t haunt me but some of the takeaways in this book have stayed with me.
Reading about Lily Tharoor caught my fascination. I was completely glued to the book as she shared her journey as a young mother in a foreign country. The language was simple, heartwarming and candid. The book portrays the personal life and journey of Lily Tharoor, and her many rare strengths as a mother.
A striking aspect of her life is her firm Bhakti to Guruvayur Krishna and Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba.
In Dr. Shashi Tharoor's prologue, he writes, "I am lucky to have a mother who sets such an amazing example and who daily gives me the unconditional love only a mother can. This book is the narrative of an 'ordinary life.'
I read the story of his mother’s life for one simple reason: I am fascinated by the real life stories of women, particularly mothers.
Few Precious and Happy moments in 2023
Gratitude to my Guru for His continuous grace and presence in my life’s journey.
Meanwhile, the New Delhi World Book Fair turned out to be a good one. I wish it had more author interactions during the weekends rather than the week days.
After spending a whole day at the World Book Fair, I head out to witness the Arth Festival, which was electrifying with its vibrant debates and discussions.
Witnessing the Arth Festival was electrifying. The debates were too good to miss.
The discussions were thought-provoking and peppered with a dash of humour.
In March 2023, one of the most exciting moments was to moderate a thought-provoking discussion on the occasion of Women’s Day 2023.
We received a tremendous response from our audience, with questions pouring in for the panelists. It was so engaging!
As the questions continued pouring in, I found myself enjoying this important discussion on Innovation and Technology with emphasis on gender equality.
This opportunity came to me through a good friend who had absolute trust in me - a heartfelt thank you, Vivek George - I hope I didn’t let you down!
The Annual Books and Bake Sale at CR Park has almost become a tradition for avid book lovers in Delhi NCR.
Why else would we wake up so early on a fine winter morning to stand in a queue for buying books that have been lovingly donated by other avid readers?
What’s the big deal, you may wonder? Many different reasons but the most important one is pretty easy and simple - we LOVE books!
